Writings
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“Failure Is Not An Option”
The NASA flight director of the Apollo 13 moon landing mission, Gene Kranz, fed up with the question regularly posed to him, "Are you going to get them back?" famously responded, "Failure is not an option." Unfortunately, "failure is not an option" has permeated our culture in debilitating ways. Somehow, we've taken a one-time life or death situation, and woven that gravity into our daily life missions.
The Hugging Habit
Growing up, I mostly lived with non-huggers. My grandfather would occasionally scoop me onto the couch and tickle me blind, which I loved, but I truly don't remember any regular hugs.
Ghouls & Goblins
‘Tis the season of wearing masks, yes? Or, if we’re honest, maybe that’s every day, unless we choose to consciously allow our authentic vulnerable selves to shine through. That act of bravery can be terrifying! Why so scary? For many it’s this: “If they see the real me, I won’t be accepted and loved. I won’t belong.”
That Door Thing
The doors of my life dance open and shut close in frequent, irregular intervals. The ongoing message I receive is this: "Avoid holding on too tightly. And, stay open to the magic." Let’s look at real-life examples of the Create-Sustain-Destroy cycle.
Grape Soda Garden
About four years ago, we embarked on a home landscaping project. Our retaining wall, the one holding up our front yard (and you know...the HOUSE!), had been in disrepair when we purchased the property. Over the following five years, the deterioration slowly progressed.
Permission Problem
When do we outgrow the need for someone else to give us permission? Are there occasions when it still makes sense? How does this work?
Time Travel
About this time last year, I met with a neurologist. Up to this point, I'd been fortunate to never have need for an MRI. I didn't quite know what to expect, but I understood that claustrophobia could be a bit of an issue. And, what I knew deep in my bones was this: if I left that day without completing the test, I'd never go back.
A Journey Home
Last year, in anticipation of selling my office and moving its contents home, my husband and I weeded out the basement. Amidst the chaos, I discovered a journal of the thoughts, secrets, dreams, and heartache of my 14 / 15-year-old self. This journal got my English teacher fired the following year, when it proved an attestation of his betrayal of my physical and emotional boundaries.
Fear of Falling
The son of a friend used to teach snowboarding. The first class comprised of a single lesson - "learning how to fall." The instructor knew the only way to learn how to have fun snowboarding was to move past the fear of falling. I hate the snow and cold, but I wish I'd had a lesson from that instructor!
The Marriage Trap
A woman pretty much planned out her entire life, contingent on her boyfriend proposing marriage in the very near future. Here's the thing about this story. The details may change, but the fundamental notion is backwards, regardless of the content.
Creative Drought
For over 12 years, I've maintained contact with you - my community - through these writings. About five years ago, I cut myself slack, for the first time ever, by skipping a month. Sitting on the shelf beside my self-judgment (for having failed at executing a single monthly missive), I found a great sense of relief.
Easy Come, Easy Go? Not So Much…
About six months ago, as I approached my (all but abandoned) office to water the plants, I received a message from the universe. On that October day, I heard: "It's time to sell the office."
Sweetness & Light
In a former chapter of my life, I sold real estate for about ten years. While I experienced no particular affinity with my first buyers, the second sale marked the beginning of some long-lasting connections.
Baking Through It
I have this sense of standing on a wooden bridge. I'm living in the current version of the "new normal," and I have absolutely no idea what a more long-lasting version of "normal" might look like when I reach the other side of the bridge, nor do I possess a clue as to how long it might take to walk there.
SAFE in a Pandemic
Over the last handful of years, I've traveled, often. One of those years, I spent the equivalent of three months in a bed other than my own. This year, of course, things have been different.
Airplane Mode
I despair at all things number related, including: time, dates, how old I was when an event happened, basic math, anniversaries, birthdays, how much something costs (including my own coaching fees!). You name it, if it involves a number, I'm likely to flub it.
My Night with India
Last November, when it was still safe to travel, Mark and I made plans to see Rob Bell's, "An Introduction to Joy." True to form, Bell delivered a thoughtful, provocative, and hilarious message. But, as so often happens when we travel to see a show, the highlight of our trip happened elsewhere.
Unconscious Privilege
About two years ago, I drove home from a Friday afternoon appointment with my chiropractor/ acupuncturist. There is a part of Pleasant Street in Arlington, where three lanes of traffic, on the overpass above Rt. 2, become a single lane. As the road narrowed, I expected the driver at my back, left quarter panel, to yield, just as I had done with the car in front of us. She didn't.
The Termini Perspective
From ages four to fourteen, I lived on Chalker Beach Road in Old Saybrook, Connecticut. We lived in a modest house of five rooms, 1.5 baths, and no basement, on a single floor. Our neighbors next door, the Termini's, resided in a comparative palace! They had a long driveway, and a two story, four bedroom, two bath house. Their yard, so enormous, the house seemed only a speck of dust on the green carpet of lawn.
Like a Mosquito
In meditation the other day, an image of a mosquito appeared before me. When the insect appeared in my mind's eye, I wondered what it represented. How was I to relate to it?