A Flood of Love
I thought I'd be in Los Angeles right now, on a personal writing retreat, and attending another "Something to Say" workshop. I suspect you had plans to be some place other than where you are at the moment, too.
In anticipation of my retreat, I'd been such a good do-bee. I readied an April newsletter several weeks ago, figuring that completion would free up space for the bigger, deeper writing ahead. And while it's a piece worthy of sharing, it seems somewhat irrelevant at this precise time.
So, here I am with you, as the world we've long known, implodes. Create - Sustain - Destroy. That is the life cycle of all things. We are born. We live. We die. We manifest artistry, projects, products, and systems. We work to keep them going. Then, we may leave them behind or re-imagine them, effectively destroying or destroying to create. Nature follows this path - always. Trees take root. They grow. Their leaves bud, bloom, and fall. And, at some point, the life of every tree comes to an end. But in the longevity of a tree's life, the create-sustain-destroy cycle occurs again and again with every season. This, too, is true of us.
Whether in our naivety or arrogance, we often believe we have power to control an outcome. I crafted a plan to travel to Los Angeles to learn and write. I believed that would happen. Instead, I'm learning and writing this piece, here at home. Things often don't turn out the way I plan. As a result of tremendous work, featuring lots of resistance and discomfort, I've discovered that getting attached to an outcome - the way I think things "should" work out - hinders my ability to be open to the possibilities as they arise.
Here's an example: if I were in L.A. right now, and the world were operating as it did when I booked my trip, I would not be stretching in the way I have been. True, I might be growing in a different way, but THIS is the way NOW. What kind of stretch?
I have long been completely opposed to having my photo taken. Not because of the end result. While I do have some vanity, I care little about how I might appear in a picture. The issue for me has always been about the act of having the photo shot. I experience this as something actually being taken from me, perhaps like those indigenous tribes who believe their soul is stolen when caught on camera. I've lived with this truth for almost my entire life.
A couple of weeks before leaving for Sri Lanka, an inner voice chimed in. "It's time to get professional photos taken. Call Sharon Ward, and get it scheduled." Uggh! Seriously? I admit, I found no time to get this on the books before leaving; however, within days of returning, I reached out to Sharon (who is talented, kind, and incredibly patient). Within two weeks, I'd followed all of her instructions, and we completed my session.
This marked a tremendous personal growth stretch for me! In that two week window, several things happened. I asked for spiritual assistance...every damn day. Perhaps because I asked for help, my inner guidance system received a mudra protocol for me to engage in to allow me to be present and protected for the experience. And, just two days before the event, a deep knowing arose, explaining why being photographed has long been a problem.
Several years ago, a tremendously gifted healer helped me to recognize, my unique energy signature morphs in a particular way. Over the course of years, I have experienced extreme emotional, mental, and physical discomfort when I get stuck between two morphed states. The essence of the learning two days before my professional shoot? Every snap shot in my life triggered that experience of "stuck" between states. Whether you believe the explanation or not, perhaps you might sympathize with my aversion to pain. I don't believe I'm "cured," but, with amazing support from Sharon Ward and my inner guidance system, I navigated those rough waters.
Why the heck does this matter? There's a freaking pandemic going on! Yes, I know, it's a slow wind up.
As one region of the world after another shuts down, to flatten the curve, with the hopes of allowing medical personnel the time, space, and supplies to treat those stricken with COVID-19, the way we've known life gets destroyed. Our ancestors birthed our way of life. We have all played a role in sustaining it. And now, there's no going out to dinner or the movies. The schools and shops are closed, and our friends and family must stay safe in their homes, lest we unintentionally infect them.
“Let's Talk About Fear”
Fear is prevalent. Whatever things may have triggered us in the old world order seem magnified 10,000 fold, because fear weighs in the air. The volume of our control freakery has dialed up and broken the knob. Because, the amount of control we grasp for is always in direct proportion to the amount of fear we experience. And what most of us fear, more than any other thing, is the unknown - the uncertainty - the as yet revealed.
Oddly, I'm experiencing minimal personal fear. Sometimes fear of getting sick or not having enough money will rise up. So, I take a breath. Then I feel and express the emotion of fear through my body or some artistic pursuit. Next, I allow myself to recognize that as future thinking - meaning an inner terrorist is attempting to grasp for control of the future - and that story is what has me feeling afraid. Then, I breathe again. I notice if I still feel fear. Sometimes, yes. At that point, though, It often has no content. So, I allow myself to feel and express that fear, and then I trust myself more for the effort.
As fear and all other emotions wash through me, I find an underlying steadiness. From that grounded space, inspiration - to share tools and strategies for navigating through this time of uncertainty - abounded. With a flood of love for you, and those unknown to me, I have started a "Third Option Wisdom" video series on both Instagram and Facebook. It's something I don't think I could have managed, were there not a pandemic and a spiritually guided photo shoot. It's a remarkable personal stretch, and hopefully of value to someone.
More amazing to me, is the outpouring of love and generosity from so many people, in a myriad of ways. Are you observing this, too? I know of yoga teachers leading on-line practices, and fitness instructors creating zoom classes. Visual artists are giving free live lessons of how to paint, draw, or create superheroes. Famous musicians have offered free #SocialDistanceSessions and unknown students have banded together to share their gifts with the world, all while remaining at home. New podcasts from Rob Bell and Brene Brown are hitting the airwaves, even as Iyanla Vanzant offers a daily live "Anti-viral" message on Facebook. Actor, Josh Gad, is reading children's stories live each evening, while Jimmy Fallon hosts a "Tonight Show at Home" edition, to help raise money for the favorite charities of his virtual guests. Carolyn Myss invites folks to participate in her daily Facebook rosary circle, while I offer a theme of prayer on Thursdays, encouraging folks to request they be included in my "Sunday Service" of personal prayer time on Sundays. Even the earth has responded lovingly - the waters of Venice canals are clear, dolphins are coming closer to shore, and China's skies are relieved of pollution. The orb we inhabit is taking a breath with us, reminding us of what is still possible on this planet.
I know the days ahead are filled with uncertainty, but here's the truth: they always have been. The idea that we ever had control over our future was an illusion. And among the many things we'll need to grieve, will be the loss of that illusion we've held so tightly. I believe, and hope, we treat this as a "destroy to create" moment. That we might find new ways to be loving toward ourselves, our close connections, our greater community, the earth that cradles us, and all of the beings we share the planet with. I know it's a big ask. I think we've got an opportunity, though. I have my fingers crossed!
In case you haven't personally witnessed the flood of love and compassion pouring from every corner, here are a few additional links you might enjoy:
I send you my love. I hope you and your loved ones remain healthy at home. If you are among those taking care of the rest of us, whether in the grocery store, delivering the mail, working in a hospital, or one of the countless other professions keeping us afloat, I thank you for your service to me and your community. I believe in us. We're in it together. I wonder what magic will be born of this moment?
With love and compassion,
Joanne Lutz
